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Decisions, decisions...

Integration

Have I made the right choice? Homesickness etc.

Integration

Postby SANDRAPAUL » Fri 18 Jun 2004 18:15 GMT

OK- The first to post a question in this category. Has anyone had that feeling that will we be welcome. Will be be accepted - after all we will be immigrants in Canada. We will be strangers. We will have to adjust to fit in. Do Canadians, as we believe, accept you for what you are, and not where you come from. Can you get work irrespective of your original nationality?
This is a very important area. Us - my family will want to integrate and make friends....how can we find out we will be welcome?
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Postby liftman » Fri 18 Jun 2004 21:35 GMT

Sandrapaul,

My sister in law and her family live in Sarnia, Ontario.

they have found that they have been (Mostly) made welcome.
There has been a little problem at school with the kids, because they have a different accent, but apart from that it has been generally favourable.

The main thing seems to be that the ones that do not fit in are the ones who are constantly referring back to the way things are done in the UK, or that it was better quality at home etc. etc.

Once you move you are Canadian, you were British, but now you are Canadian!
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Postby Graeme » Fri 18 Jun 2004 22:06 GMT

I agree with Liftman, if you set out with the intention of joining in, blending in, etc then you will be accepted. The problems happen with the groups who form their own little enclaves and never integrate. For those who join in and become part of the new country, they are generally accepted with open arms. Become encultured and become welcomed (I should patent that phrase)
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Postby Glaswegian » Mon 21 Jun 2004 15:50 GMT

We'd agree that we have
been (Mostly) made welcome
- it's a different country and it can take a while to get settled.

I'd also agree with
problems happen with the groups who form their own little enclaves and never integrate
- just bear in mind that they might have got here before you :wink:

Look at the people around you who you get on with - friends, neighbours, etc Then look at the people around you that you just don't bother talking to. What's the proportion? How long did it take to find the people you like? It just takes a little time - you just have to make the effort.

It's Canada - unless you're 100% First Nations, there's an immigrant somewhere in everybody's family tree :D
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Postby Thelma » Wed 23 Jun 2004 04:26 GMT

Hi Sandra Paul
I agree with the comments the others have made. Don't expect to fit in the moment you arrive. You will sound different and people will probably ask you continually (but in a friendly way) where you come from etc. Just be patient, smile and tell them! I found the majority of Canadians I've met to be extremely friendly, welcoming and very accepting of newcomers, as long as the new arrivals don't keep criticizing the Canadian ways and saying how much different/better it is at home. It's a natural tendency to do this but try to keep it private, until that phase passes :wink:

Good luck with your move, stop worrying :) and just enjoy the experience of your new life in Canada.

Cheers
T :)
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Postby Purley » Fri 9 Jul 2004 16:31 GMT

I hadn't seen this post before until I posted here. On another board I made what I admit were disparaging remarks about some people who emigrated here earlier this year and are going back already.

The woman of the couple took great offence to my comments that I thought it was a real waste of good money unless you made a commitment to yourself to stay at least a year. Lots of people hate it at first - everything is different - everyone is different. Who on earth would feel right at home in this situation? Certainly not me. Besides which, as I said your investment in the project probably runs into the thousands - both in £ and $ - so you owe it to yourself, in my opinion, to tough it out even if you hate it at first.

I have to admit when I first came here and that was over 30 years ago, I hated it. But I had too much pride to admit that I had made a mistake and so I toughed it out. Once we moved into a new house and got friendly with the neighbours - everything was just like home from then on in. We still live in the same neighbourhood and still socialize with the same neighbours we met 30 years ago.

I still miss my family - more so now that I am older - this seems to be something that happens with age.

You have to remember, like someone else said - they were here before you. Its hard for anybody to break into an established group. What I think you need to do is to get one friend who can introduce you to the group etc. etc. and then you will be on your way. I have a friend who has lived in Regina for 35 odd years. She decided she wanted to start lawn bowling. She didn't know anyone and went along by herself. She never managed to get into the "group". I don't think they were particularly being unfriendly, it was just they were established and didn't bother with her. She said the same thing - if she had gone along with one person who was a member of the group, who could introduce her, she would have been fine.

Maybe you have to try various groups before you find one you like - there are churches and if you have kids, taking them along to a swimming class or gymnatics or whatever.

The woman I mentioned above said that practically the only church groups in Regina were people who were trying to convert her to be a "Jehova". That is rubbish. There are all kinds of different religions in Regina - you just need to be introduced to them and they need to know you want to be friends. If you have a positive attitude I am sure it will all work out .
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Postby justajester » Fri 9 Jul 2004 20:59 GMT

And it's true...unless you are native (the term used to be Indian) you are an immigrant. My family is many generations Canadian, but we still came from somewhere else. I even found that when i moved to a very small town from a city it was difficult to fit in at first, so i bought a dog (children were grown or they would have done the trick) and walked him around. People would stop and talk to me then.
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Postby leoville » Fri 9 Jul 2004 21:42 GMT

JaJ,

Am glad to hear that you as a born and bred canadian, admits it that you are an Immigrant too in this country, as you are not NATIVE ! It's funny how people try and justify when their folks first came over, as compared to folks that came 1-10yrs ago to mean they are REAL canadians :roll:

The only real canadians are the NATIVE people !!!
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Postby liftman » Fri 9 Jul 2004 22:32 GMT

I understand where you are coming from, Leoville, but surely, ALL citizens are REAL Canadians?
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Postby Graeme » Fri 9 Jul 2004 23:31 GMT

The original natives, or first nations as they like to be called, apparantly drifted into North America over the land bridge joining Alaska and Russia. They too were immigrants.
I think we are all immigrants we just arrived at different times.
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Postby leoville » Sat 10 Jul 2004 00:23 GMT

We are, but it's the ones that try to deny the fact that they are, because they've lost touch with where they come from originally, or because they are ashamed of their country of origin, that really get my goat.
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Immmigrant

Postby SANDRAPAUL » Sat 10 Jul 2004 10:29 GMT

Our name is Fissenden. When asked where does it derive from I always say Sweden or Denmark. I believe back in the 1500s. They then look at me as a kind of viking and then where I live, where I came from and what I do is to be honest irrelevant. We are all part of the same world. Its what we are inside and how we treat our fellow man/woman that is the true important factor. We live in Kent. My wife is from Manchester. She lived in Cornwall. The Cornish look at people from Kent as mini immigrants - especially during the summer. It goes on and on....
At least this part of the forum is used now!
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Postby Purley » Sun 11 Jul 2004 02:04 GMT

Yes! When my uncle - Glyn Thomas - retired, he and my aunt moved to a small village in Wales. Despite the fact that he was obviously Welsh, the locals treated them like outcasts for the longest time. I remember my aunt telling me that they would speak Welsh in the pub just so she couldn't understand!
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Postby CanadianMom » Sun 13 Jan 2008 04:06 GMT

Old post I know, but I wanted to clarify something. People seemed to think a born and bred Canadian not calling himself "native" inaccurate, misleading, or meaning he acknowledges himself coming from another place.
While we do like acknowledging our ancestry here, I understand why he did not just say he was native Canadian. HERE that would imply immediately Indian ancestry-and means something more/different then just being a native of a country(by birth). It was interesting reading the reponses from those who don't know how we use the word "native" here.Yes it can mean as all assume (born here), but is rarely used that way. First assumption would be a native Indian heritage. Just so you know that little cultural/language difference.
In fact, today I posted a response to someone who thought I had immigrated to Canada. I did happen to use the traditional meaning and say I am native Canadian. But immediately I went back and changed that to born and bred, because HERE that would instantly be read as Native Indian (First Nation Peoples), and that would be inaccurate. So a small and interesting difference. :D
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Postby sawman » Wed 6 Feb 2008 02:29 GMT

one of my new canadian chums refers to himself as english canadian - he is 6th generation canadian - which means his family were some of the pioneers who founded this country. losts of my other local friends often define their canadianism by the numbers of generation that have lived here - essentially we are all immigrants together, except the first nation obviously.
s
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