Siesta in the Sierra
Excursions in the Provinces of Madrid and Castilla-León Introduction It may appear as if British Expat’s travel correspondent has lost his touch on exotic locations. No…
Lesson Six: Get Into The Bit
“The message left on my answerphone had intrigued me: two policewomen whose main interest in foreign language learning was to sing karaoke. How do you prepare a lesson with these two? No use planning a quick dash through the Present Perfect. If anything, it was going to have to be Sing Something Present Simple.” Graeme coaches El Duo Dinámico…
Lesson Five: Strong arms and the law
“There is no point in resenting the fact that your fingerprints are to be forever-and-ever-olé on some petty functionary’s computer, nor worth protesting that ‘back home we don’t do that kind of thing’. You have to go with a submissive ‘here-unto-you-I-present-my-fingers-do-with them-what-you-will’ attitude.” Dr Graeme Porte applies for his Spanish ID card.
Lesson Four: Tiptoe Through The Tutus
“I stood up, recognised a 3/4 rhythm, and tried to spot myself in the mirror. Not difficult. I was the only one moving sideways instead of forwards, stomping two seconds late, holding half a castanet wrapped round my thumb the other round the wrist, and wearing corduroy trousers.” Graeme attends a class himself – a dancing class.
Lesson Three: Chicken chests and cheeps
“I groaned inwardly. So, no money again, then. I came to call them my ‘Russian classes’ – goods in exchange for knowledge, consommés for consonants in the present case. Expanding my stomach rather than my wallet.” Dr Graeme Porte’s latest students – restaurateurs – offer payment in kind rather than cash!
Lesson Two: Never forget Lesson Number One
“While still regaining his breath, Mr Jesús María d’Avila opened hostilities: ‘Plis, …Ah must to eensist…joo coll me just Jesus.’ ‘Just Jesus?’ ‘No… Ah em… only Jesus, noothink more. Not Mary, plis.’ He was at least humility – if not divinity – personified…” Dr Graeme Porte extends his student list!